Always, Makoto
by Jovian Princess
Summary: A collection of letters from Makoto to her closest friends, soldiers, and loves to be read after she will have died.
1. Default Chapter

Always, Makoto  
  
"Always, Makoto," which originally appeared at my Sailorjupiter shrine   
  
Emerald Star, is a collection of letters written by Makoto to all of her closest   
  
friends and loves. Originally they were to be read after she will have died,   
  
kind of a final statement to her loved ones. I seemed to have changed my mind   
  
somewhere along the way, for a few of the latter letters are written with   
  
referrences to the future.  
  
These works focus mainly on the manga, especially the latter ones. Anime  
  
referrences may be made because I did not have a set tone in mind when I wrote   
  
these letters; you will no doubt begin to see mixtures of the two styles.  
  
I would also like to clarify that Makoto was never involved with, nor   
  
even close to Nephrite in either the anime or the manga. I drew my inspiration   
  
from a beautifully drawn artbook picture of the four Senshi with the four Dark   
  
Kingdom Generals: Minako and Kunzite, Rei and Jadeite, Ami and Zoisite, and   
  
Makoto and Nephrite. (My frequent visitors should be noticing a pattern! ^_-)  
  
I hope you enjoy reading the letters as much as I enjoyed writing them!  
  
The Mastermind,  
  
Kotono 


	2. Dearest Usagi

Always, Makoto  
  
Dearest Usagi-chan,  
  
Oh, my dear Princess. Our beloved Usagi-chan. How wonderful it has been   
  
coming to know you. More and more I come to love your innocent, childlike heart.   
  
First of all, I would like to say thank you. Thank you for being the wonderful   
  
friend and leader that you are. You have proven yourself worthy of leading the   
  
senshi team countless times. I now realize that even though my commerades and I   
  
fought with you over leadership responsibilities, none of us could have ever   
  
matched you. Not in a thousand lifetimes. When all of us would sacrifice ourselves   
  
and you were left alone with only your ginzuishou, your courage and integrity were   
  
amazing. When you stood alone against Queen Beryl, you could have easily run away,   
  
or just given up, realizing that there was no more hope left of our universe. But   
  
you didn't run. You stood tall and defeated her. And because of that, we can now   
  
live in a peaceful future on Earth. Your enemies are very fortunate to have you as   
  
a counterpart. Your loving ways could (and have) softened the hardest of hearts.   
  
Remember Black Lady and the Ayakashi sisters? Because of your mercy they were   
  
spared a horrible death and can now live peacefully. Even Galaxia, who was consumed  
  
by Chaos, melted with your soft words and unbelievable forgiveness.  
  
I feel so incredibly lucky to have you as a friend. When most looked upon   
  
me in fear and tried their best to stay away, you broke the barriers they put up   
  
around me and proved that the rumors about me weren't true. I couldn't believe it   
  
that day when you so casually popped up and asked to eat lunch with me. Thank you   
  
for that simple act, Usagi-chan. Even if it was just your grumbling stomach that   
  
brought us together. Your kindness is truly a gift, Usagi-chan. Always use that   
  
gift to your advantage and never lose it. You are one of the best friends a girl   
  
could ever hope for.  
  
I really believe that it was fate that made that car speed by when it did.   
  
Because of it, I have met one of my very dear friends. I love you so much, Usagi-  
  
chan, odango and all.  
  
Love Always,  
  
Mako-chan 


	3. Dearest Ami

Always, Makoto  
  
Dearest Ami-chan,  
  
Where could I possibly begin? There are so many things I wish to say to   
  
you, dear Ami-chan. Like the Aqua Illusion you wield, there is always something   
  
unexpected about you. The shy girl at Juuban Junior High is mearly a cover of the   
  
true Ami-chan I love so much.   
  
You are a terrific fighter when called ot battle. Foolish others thought   
  
you weak; not of use to the senshi team. How fatally wrong. It is true that you   
  
may not have been the fiercest, strongest, or toughest warrior of the bunch. But   
  
brawn without brains is a terrible mess; your mind was the perfect balance. A few   
  
quick clicks on the keyboard of your super-computer often save us from hours of   
  
intense battle. And it is your cunning that, at times, truly win the fight.   
  
Undoubtedly you remember our final battle with the Dark Kingdom. It was your sharp   
  
mind saved us--and the rest of the universe for that matter--from Beryl's reign.   
  
Many times you have kept me from rushing into battle, as I often have a tendency   
  
to do, and made me see from a different perspective. Thank you for that, Ami-chan.   
  
Not only have you been a great warrior, but you have also been a dear and   
  
loving friend. You were always willing to help me with a project or a homework   
  
question that I didn't understand. You have more patience than anyone else I know.   
  
Like when Usagi bothers you about doing her homework for her, you stay calm and   
  
say no, where as I would probably lose my temper. I wish I could be more like you.   
  
Your beautiful smile and sparkling blue eyes could cheer up anyone. Please, always   
  
stay the way you are, the loving and understanding Ami-chan we all know and love.   
  
You are a sweet heart, a disiplined young lady, and a peace maker all   
  
wrapped up in one. Who could ever want more in a friend?   
  
Love,  
  
Mako-chan 


	4. Dearest Rei

Always, Makoto  
  
Dearest Rei-chan,  
  
I am not quite sure where to begin, dear Rei-chan. So much has happened   
  
since I met you. We have all endured such laughter and sorrow, tears and   
  
jubilation; it seems that time was just a figment of our imaginations. I suppose   
  
that the best way to start is at the beginning...   
  
I must admit that when I first met you, I was not sure what to expect. I   
  
had heard some awful, nasty rumors that people had been spreading. About you being   
  
mean, bossy, and even cold. They were rumors I knew all too well, for they had   
  
been spread about me as well. Being the victim of cruel gossip I knew better than   
  
judge you from what I had heard. I thank God that I took that chance. You are   
  
everything they say you are not. Assumptions are terrible things; they kept too   
  
many away from the real Hino Rei.   
  
You are among the best fighters I have ever seen. Careful, yet not afraid   
  
to attack if need comes. You have truly been a blessing to the senshi team. Your   
  
ability to sense when danger draws near is incredible. But what else could one   
  
expect from a shrine maiden? Above all, your dedication is what truly captures me.   
  
I shudder to think back upon our final battle with Queen Beryl. But when I do, I   
  
see a fire-hearted soldier recognize danger and willingly take the blow. You knew,   
  
Rei-chan, that you were to be killed, but that didn't phase you. As long as it   
  
meant that our Princess was to be safe. That kind of loyalty is rarer than any.   
  
You have taught villains everywhere, through your strength and your courage, not   
  
to mess with fire.   
  
At times you seem aloof, Rei-chan. As if there was something heavy on your   
  
mind. We all could sense it, but none of us would have guessed it's true nature.   
  
Who would have guessed the Fire's Rose to be in love? It touched me to have you   
  
share your thoughts of that with me; your casablanca memory. Love is a wonderful   
  
thing, Rei-chan. But like with so much else there is a dark side to it. It pains   
  
me to know that you have endured the dark side of love. It is a thing no young   
  
woman should go through. I know because I have been through it as well. But I   
  
promise you, Rei-chan, that there is someone out there. Someone wonderful who   
  
will be everything you ever hoped for. And you will be more than he ever dreamed   
  
of.   
  
I am so happy to have befriended you, dear Rei-chan. When some people look   
  
at you they see only an odd girl. When I look at you I see a beautiful princess, a   
  
faithful senshi, a disciplined priestess, and a loving girl who is so often   
  
misunderstood. All I hope is that one day they will be able to look through my   
  
eyes, to see the flame-like beauty that you are.   
  
Love,  
  
Mako-chan 


	5. Dearest Minako

Always, Makoto  
  
Dearest Minako-chan,  
  
My dearest Minako-chan. What a joy and honored privledge it has been to   
  
know you. Like most who gazed upon the Goddess Aphrodite, I fell in love with your   
  
heart. A heart as pure as your Cresent Beam.   
  
Our trials as senshi were hard and long, but sharing them with you has   
  
truly made them memorable. You have been a great friend and partner. Even though   
  
you were capable of fighting without us, I am so glad you joined the other senshi.   
  
It is a great treat to fight along with a warrior more experienced than I. No   
  
matter how tough the villain, you always stayed calm and cool and in the end you   
  
were always victorious. I have learned alot from you, Minako-chan. You have taught   
  
me to look upon things with a different perspective. I could not imagine going to   
  
battle without you right beside me. You and I made a wonderful team.   
  
I am so happy to have met you. Who else would help me search for cute   
  
guys? With your unresistable laugh and sense of style, who wouldn't want to spend   
  
a day shopping with you? I loved the times we spent together. Even when our   
  
differences blinded our commonness and sparked quarrels. They are truly some of   
  
the most memorable times of my life. Being with you meant the world to me.   
  
Love and Thunder don't seem to have much in common. One a warm light, the   
  
other a violent flash. But somehow we found a common ground. Even in the way of   
  
lost love. I understand completely. I know how it is to love someone who does not   
  
return your love. What did you feel, Mina-chan? When the one you loved loved   
  
another? I know that feeling all too well. I wish you wouldn't have gone through   
  
that. I wish I could erase it from your past. It pains me to know that you have   
  
hurt. A Goddess of Love should feel nothing less than joy. You reminded me of the   
  
nymph Echo, pining for her dear Narcissus, who ran from her and fell in love with   
  
another; but unlike Echo, you have maintained a warm, happy exterior to shelter   
  
your shattered heart. But you can't fool one who has had the same experience. I   
  
saw glimpses of your painful past in the depths of your sky blue eyes. The   
  
strength and integrity you harbor truly amaze me.   
  
In the end you are the mysterious senshi, SailorV, the beautiful soldier,   
  
Sailorvenus, and our own happy, loving, Minako-chan. It is no wonder that you are   
  
the Senshi of Love.   
  
Love,  
  
Mako-chan 


	6. Dear Haruka

Always, Makoto  
  
Dear Haruka-san,  
  
I cannot help but think of you as I gaze at the beautiful pale blue heavens  
  
above.   
  
The first time I saw you, I was struck with awe at your calm, mysterious   
  
motions; the sense of coolness in your voice; the secret in your eyes. I must   
  
admit, however, that when I first laid eyes on you, I thought you were a boy. And   
  
a very cute one at that! I hope that does not offend you, Haruka-san. Forgive me   
  
if I seemed a little lovestruck; the others are often commenting on my various   
  
crushes. Even though you weren't the boy of my dreams, you were nothing less than   
  
what I hoped you'd be. A skilled fighter, a fun friend, exciting, devoted... a   
  
great person to spend a sunny afternoon with. I wanted so much to be like you,   
  
Haruka-san. You are such a great person; the woman I want myself to be. A red   
  
scarf in my closet is a token of that.   
  
Don't let me decieve you. I was not only drawn to your physique. Your   
  
manner caught my attention as well. You have wonderful humor, but know how to be   
  
serious when certain matters are discussed. Like our fate. It is difficult   
  
fighting a powerful negative force; having limited help; able to trust no one.   
  
Even now I am amazed at how well you and Michiru-san held up through it all. I   
  
feel very privledged to have you as a team mate. The very grounds quake as you   
  
ward off enemies with a passion unlike any other. You are quick with both your   
  
fists and your mind; a quality I wish were mine. That I admire about you, Haruka-  
  
san. Being physically strong is something anyone can achieve through some hard   
  
work, but being emotionally well off is something different. Thank you for being   
  
that way. Thank you for being yourself. Our dear Haruka-san.   
  
If ever I am to meet my soul mate, that one person in life who means the   
  
world to you, I hope he is nothing less than the kind of person you prove to be.   
  
Sincerely,  
  
Makoto 


	7. Dearest Senpai

Always, Makoto  
  
My Dearest Senpai,   
  
It's been so long since I've seen you. And yet I cannot get your face out   
  
of my head. The years really seem to pass quickly, don't they? It's now been two   
  
years since our last day in the rain. I've been thinking about you a lot lately,   
  
Senpai. Perhaps because as I write this note it is falling rain outside. Isn't it   
  
interesting how certain dates just seem to stick in your mind? That last rainy day   
  
does that to me. Whenever the heavens weep I cannot help but think of you.   
  
I hope life has been treating you well. I'm fairing okay, I suppose. These   
  
Tokyo skies are grey, but I have my plants to comfort me. What sort of things have   
  
you been up to lately? Oh, I wish we could talk of such things again. I miss your   
  
company, dear Senpai. Even our talks of the smallest things. Long days with no one   
  
to talk to have had their toll on me.   
  
Something has been bearing on my mind ever since our last meeting. It has   
  
always been too painful to ask, but I suppose now it is even more painful to   
  
continue wondering. What went wrong with us, dear Senpai? Did I, by chance, make   
  
you want to leave? What did I do to wrong you? Whatever it be, I am forever in   
  
regret. I couldn't bear to hurt you.   
  
I am sorry I could not have been better. More graceful, intelligent,   
  
feminine. If I could trade my height for a petite form, I would, if it should have   
  
pleased you. I would change my rough appearance for that of a more feminine one.   
  
But that is past now. And I cannot go back.   
  
I thought it was love that we shared. And perhaps it was, on my part. But   
  
love is something to be shared between two people, and I fear ours was not. All   
  
our conversations, adventures, stolen kisses blinded me into believing their spell.  
  
I suppose their charm kept me from seeing the obvious. That you weren't in love   
  
with me.   
  
I watch the rain fall outside and the hole in my heart deepens. I wish it   
  
could have worked out between you and I, Senpai. But it didn't, and that's all   
  
that can be said. I hope life brings you the love and happiness I could not give   
  
you.   
  
Much Love,  
  
Makoto 


	8. To Nephrite

Always, Makoto  
  
Nephrite,   
  
I have shied from writing this letter too many times. The realization that   
  
you would perhaps laugh and toss it aside brought too much pain to my heart. I   
  
force myself to be bold as I swirl ink upon this page. I have buried this sorrow   
  
for too long; I need you to know my thoughts, my emotions; even if you merely cast   
  
this aside, I need to know, at least, that for one last time I tried to reach you.   
  
No reason exists that states I should still grieve for you. You are my   
  
enemy, my foe. You fought my comrades and I to the death with undying hate. You   
  
swore your allegiance to the one who could destroy all that we fight for. In   
  
reality I should curse you; I should hate you in return. With all my power and   
  
fury I should avenge the loss of my heart. But I cannot bring myself to that   
  
conclusion no matter how firey the anger burns within me or how cold the tears   
  
stain my face. For even after the passing of millennia I have not forgotten the   
  
whispered words, the glances, the velvet embraces. I have not forgotten the way   
  
you used to be.   
  
I still think with longing of our days during the height of the Moon   
  
Kingdom. Still I can remember the nervous joy on your face when first we conversed.   
  
You brought so much happiness to my world, so much light. You were everything that   
  
a perfect suitor should be; everything that I could have endeavored to hope for.   
  
Then I thought our blossoming love could last an eternity. Our scarlet passions   
  
lay like fog wherever we went. I can still smell the shy lilies; I can still taste   
  
the rose wine. I became drunk, hopelessly at a loss of senses, on our love. I could   
  
have layed in your arms until the silver stars fell from their heavenly out-posts.   
  
I wanted to be with you always; to be your lover and your soulmate.   
  
But happiness, no matter how well framed by perfection, fades, and   
  
treasured hearts become lost.   
  
You took your leave of me.   
  
I cannot begin to describe my thoughts or actions when I learned of your   
  
betrayal--betrayal, it's such a cruel, unforgiving word. I felt angered, cheated,   
  
as if I had been awoken from a glorious dream too soon. Feeling stupid and enraged   
  
I locked myself inside my heart, encasing my emotions in steel. Those were, and   
  
still are, my blackest hours. The days I learned the dark sides of love.   
  
Armed with my rage I sought revenge. I wanted you to hurt as badly as I   
  
had. I took up a shield of ignorance and a spear of fury and marched tearfully to   
  
our first and final war. But the pain flooded my soul upon seeing you again. I   
  
could not forget the passionate love we shared, no matter how far you had strayed   
  
from me. I matched your powerful blows with a stinging heart. I cried, Nephrite,   
  
when I fought you that last time. I prayed furiously for your surrender, for your   
  
return, a return that would never come. Through the night I fought, until the   
  
cruelty of war consumed me.   
  
That tragic end of my first life left in me a wound that will never heal.   
  
I failed you, Nephrite, for I could not save you.   
  
Even through the years, I have never stopped loving you. You were my one,   
  
my love. There lies in my soul an emptiness in which only you will fit. With that   
  
emptiness filled I will be whole, at rest. Your love completes me.   
  
Love always,  
  
Makoto 


End file.
